Thomas Middleditch is a swinger: Swinging has saved our marriage
Thomas Middleditch is in HBO’s Silicon Valley and some films here and there, but most people know him from Silicon Valley. Middleditch is married to a woman named Mollie Gates, who is a costume designer. They were married in 2015, after dating for about three years. Middleditch is Canadian, he’s 37 years old and he and Mollie don’t seem to have any kids? And, oh right, they’re also swingers. This shocked me! I know I shouldn’t be shocked by anything anymore, but I really wasn’t expecting this story – Middleditch gave an interview to Playboy and he discussed (at length) how he’s a swinger in a nontraditional marriage. He also makes it sound like he’s the only one swinging?
Thomas Middleditch is swinging for the fences. The 37-year-old actor, best known for HBO’s “Silicon Valley,” and most recently seen in “Godzilla: King of the Monsters,” spoke with Playboy for its “Pleasure Issue” at length about his swinger lifestyle and his marriage to costume designer Mollie Gates.
“Only after I got married was I like, ‘Mollie, I’m sorry, but we have to get nontraditional here.’ To her credit, instead of saying ‘F–k you, I’m out,’ she was like, ‘Let’s figure this out.’ To be honest, swinging has saved our marriage. We have different speeds, and we argue over it constantly, but it’s better than feeling unheard and alone and that you have to scurry in the shadows.” And even though he got candid with the outlet, Middleditch prefaced his explanation with, “I don’t know how much I can say, because I don’t want my wife to be mad at me.”
“It’s a perpetual state of management and communication, to the point where it’s like, ‘Alright, we’ve got to stop’ … I’m gas, and she’s brakes,” he added, before noting, “This is actually the premise for a comedy series we’re writing together. I love my wife like I’ve never loved anyone before. With two people who feel that way about each other, how do you go down that road? It’s tough. Bring a therapist along for the ride.”
When asked if he’s concerned about becoming a representation of swingers, he said, “I would be honored to be the face of something. I don’t give a f–k, but my wife is more private, so I have to juggle that.” But when it comes to fans wanting to sleep with him and how that affects Gates, Middleditch admitted it’s a slippery slope. “That’s one of the trickier elements of it all, because Mollie doesn’t get that and yet she has to witness it. I’m like, ‘Come on, what about this chick who’s obviously really into me?’ And Mollie will say, ‘Yeah, she’s into you. Where do I fit in?’ That question comes up. It’s a game of inches on a minefield to try to predict who’s going to feel safe,. My first concern is Mollie. Anything that happens has to be run by the queen.”
I mean… I’m all for people being honest. Be honest with yourselves, be honest with your spouse, and if you’re a celebrity, be honest with the public. People will accept a lot if you’re honest. While I think this arrangement sounds like a trainwreck, what do I know? Maybe it works for them and I hope they’ve got it figured out. The way he describes it, it’s less “swinging” and more like he tells his wife that he wants to sleep with other women and she has to sign off on it, like he’s having affairs with Mollie’s knowledge and approval. But does Mollie get to sleep with other people too? Hm. Also: he’s a total d–k for only telling her he wanted to be a “swinger” AFTER they got married. That’s the sh-t you discuss BEFORE you get married.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
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